Wednesday, July 1, 2009

My triumphant return... Release the Cyborg Puppies of Doom!

I've had interesting stories about pets, but this is the first time that it turns out a human has effectively peed on our carpet and counted on us to blame it on the cats.

Just earlier, Lou Ryan was leaving a phone message for his lawyer brother that went something like this:
` "Is it illegal to pee in a cup and then empty it on someone's carpet in a malicious manner? One of these days, I'm going to consult you about something normal...."

I'd say, that's life as normal for us. Onto my drawings...

...Back from 2006! It's Dr. Nociceptor, and she's anxiously pacing, which tends to stir up her mechanical henchmen.

restless nociceptor

Yeah. What's Nociceptor so restless over? She just may be worried that her Cyborg Puppies of Doom are going to get caught by the mean old dog catcher....

puppies are coming

Aren't they so sweet? And they're much better-trained than people who pour bottles of piss all over your house the night before the landlord comes... and then later on that day when your friend brings over his dog.

WOW. Right?

Even worse, B-Gangsta screamed at me and Johnny for hours on end, like this:
` "A cat can't pee all over the house in one night! How could you not notice one puddle, then another, then another? The whole house reeks! You're a bunch of pigs! You can live in a piss-filled house, but I won't tolerate it!"

Just because of this territory-marking, the cats haven't used the litter box since then - even though the carpets are now cleaner than when we moved in - they only use the great outdoors now.

Who would do such a thing?

It's John who works at Gold's Gym, apparently retaliating for us kicking him out for his meth consumption and making meth-pipes in the Man Shed. If his boss were to read this post, he'd have some explaining to do.
` Probably won't happen: My blogs only seem to be read by people who live far away from here, though a couple of locals have read them at least a few times.

Yeah, pretty fucked-up, isn't it? We also found some of his piss in a Smirnoff bottle in the downstairs bathroom.

In other news, don't forget to check out Lou Ryan is Killed by Psycho-Bitch With Gun, a post containing a short film which was made in 48 hours. It also has the rest of Crypticon Idol on it, too, featuring Lou Ryan as Pinhead, except for the live show from June 6. I don't know if that one's going on YouTube, but I'll tell you if it is.

Clumsy sentence structure. I have no time for such silly things as editing.


Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

Whom do your suspect as the culprit?

Alex says, "No kitty katz dud dat. We pre-furrz our litter boxiez. OK?"

S E E Quine said...

Suspect? Evidently, you and your cat didn't read past the very top of the post....

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